Bill's Barbeque Review

Bill's Rating System

Bill's Rating System tm, sm, ope   

      = worth repeated local patronage (e.g. Golden Rule, B'ham Ala.)   

      = worth a detour (e.g., Lexington Barbeque, Lexington, NC)   

      = worth a pilgrimage (e.g., Ollie's, B'ham, Ala.)   

These ratings are based solely on a basic pork barbecue sandwich. The quality of other dishes, service, decor, and ambience may be remarked, but are not factored into the ratings.  Service at a barbeque place is expected to be sincere but erratic even when officious. French fries are not expected to rise above the mediocre, hush puppies are never anything but.  A particular effort has been made to note the availability of pie and beer (please do not combine them), and to ignore the coffee (good coffee is not scheduled to be served in barbeque places until after the opening of the seventh seal). General hygiene is noted but not a factor unless it calls into question the wholesomeness of the sandwich itself.

Red Alert

RED ALERT: It has come to Bill's attention that an aggressive campaign to eradicate genuine Southern barbecue has "done snuck up on us," to coin a phrase. This campaign is being waged by a commercial oufit calling itself (of all things) "Southern Pride." This company markets an automated "cooker" that purports to save costs and time. It's phoney baloney, and baloney's not even barbecue. "Southern Shame" is more like it!   Barbecue by definition is pork slow cooked over hickory coals in an open pit--if you don't believe me, check your Oxford (Miss.) English Dictionary!  They claim to have closed over 1000 open pits!  Bill will no longer review any but genuine open-pit establishments. But Bill will be compiling a blacklist of "pseudoque" places. You know who you are and you are warned!